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H O
W A R D U N I
V E R S I T Y Faces & Voices IV AN ANTHOLOGY OF VERSE AND PROSE Ultracell
Service A tall, Caucasian man stands on the sidewalk of a busy downtown street checking himself out in his reflection of a window of a high-class restaurant. Concealed under his long black coat are a blue dress shirt and a black tie decorated with a thatch pattern. He slicks his hair back and winks at himself with a reassuring confident smile. He then gives himself the thumbs up sign as he pulls out the engagement ring that he plans to present to his girlfriend tonight at this elegant restaurant. He confidently strolls into the restaurant up to the waiter and says “Reservations for Smith please. Then he adds giddily, “My girlfriend’s going to meet me here tonight and I’m going to pop the big one.” The waiter openly expresses his indifference. He rolls his eyes as he leads the man to his table. The man takes a seat at the table set for two and the waiter hands him an envelope. “This arrived for you earlier, sir,” the waiter says in his thick English accent. He smirks as he walks away. The man looks slightly perplexed as he begins to open the envelope. He pulls out a picture. This picture looks familiar. It used to be of him and his girlfriend but now the place that he once occupied in the picture was torn out. As he began to ponder this another picture slipped out of the envelope and into his lap. This picture was of his girlfriend kissing some muscle-bound man as she held up her ring finger to show off the huge platinum diamond engagement ring that this Fabio look-alike had given her. The man’s eyes widen in a crazed look as he began to scream “Noooo!!!!” Suddenly a deep, smooth, masculine voice chimes in from out of oblivion, “Hey, she tried to call and tell you but your phone was turned off. You should have had Ultracell cellular phone service with free voice-mail and no roaming charges.” The attention is focused back in on the Caucasian man. He is sobbing uncontrollably and banging his head on the table as the waiter who previously showed him to his table attempts to comfort him although he still has that same smirk on his face. “Man,” I think to myself as I recline back in my Lay-Z Boy sofa-chair in my living room and flip the channel of the television via the remote control. “Commercials are so stupid these days.” | |
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2000 Howard University. H. Patrick Swygert, President | |||
